Quite a lot of planning goes into an NBA All-Star Sport. That does not imply loads of thought goes into it.
When San Francisco’s trademark fog acts as a closing curtain on the festivities Sunday night time, the All-Star Sport can be remembered for 3 issues.
The unhappy half is: two of the three did not even happen.
Let’s study what may have been:
The Clark struck midnight
Little question, the spotlight of All-Star weekend would have been nationwide icon Caitlin Clark vs. hometown hero Stephen Curry in a made-for-TV shootout that might have taken 3-point brilliance to heights by no means beforehand seen.
Alas, Clark needs to host the occasion subsequent summer time in Indianapolis. Possibly she’ll invite Curry.
However shedding the star attraction would not cancel the principle occasion. For crying out loud, the Tremendous Bowl had a nationwide anthem even after Taylor Swift elected to take a seat it out.
Little question, the NBA tried to give you SOMETHING. You do not get many (any?) alternatives like this: A Curry-hosted sport within the NBA hometown of Klay Thompson, with two different A-list logo-launching choices in Bay Space natives Sabrina Ionescu and Damian Lillard.
The probabilities had been countless. The creativity wasn’t. Heck, they made the dunk occasion all about Vince Carter when the Bay Space is house to a fair higher dunk trendsetter, J.R. Rider.
What may they’ve performed? They may have requested me …
Curry and Ionescu, taking pictures rapid-fire 3-pointers from designated spots nicely past the arc with a time restrict, vs. LeBron James and Angel Reese from marks uptown quite than downtown. The previous Good vs. Evil duel of historic 49ers fame.
Ah, however there’s extra. Curry and Ionescu are teamed with Brock Purdy and the face of the brand new Golden State Valkyries, Kate Martin. James and Reese get Aaron Rodgers and Tonya Harding. The sidekicks are standing on the baseline, armed with miniature rubber ‘Kyrie basketballs, taking limitless goal on the shooters in a dodgeball-style frenzy.
It may have blown the roof off the place.
Or you’ll be able to have Winston Garland’s son on heart stage. Take your choose.
Generally TNT fizzles
Could 28, 2024; Dallas, Texas, USA; Shaquille O’Neal watches the sport between the Dallas Mavericks and the Minnesota Timberwolves in sport 4 of the western convention finals for the 2024 NBA playoffs at American Airways Middle. Obligatory Credit score: Jerome Miron-Imagn Photographs Such is the character of sports activities that the bosses get accused of outlandish issues. Like paying off Tremendous Bowl refs. And emailing broadcasters Jayson Tatum promotional scripts.
This is one other…
Is there any doubt the All-Star Game roster selection wasn’t rigged?
Shaq will get all of the old-timers. Charles a international contingent. And Kenny a bunch of up-and-comers. It could not have been scripted extra Bachelor-esque.
Then—wink, wink—Shaq’s assortment of Outdated Format MVPs attracts the NBA’s farm membership (aka the Rising Stars winners) in an effort to mild on fireplace the sneakers of LeBron, Curry, Kevin Durant and a bunch of 30-somethings with no real interest in working up a sweat whereas on trip.
In the meantime, led by Luka Doncic and extra fascinated by stuffing themselves on the pregame unfold, Charles’ across-the-pond, see-food eaters get matched up with a bunch of USA 2028 Olympic wannabes.
All within the curiosity of ratcheting up the power stage in a fan-unfriendly effort to show that protection wins All-Star championships.
Coincidence? We’ll know for positive if Tim Donaghy tosses the opening tip.
Getting Mullie, Timmy … however not Iggy with it
Mar 7, 2023; Oklahoma Metropolis, Oklahoma, USA; Golden State Warriors ahead Andre Iguodala (9) reacts after a play towards the Oklahoma Metropolis Thunder throughout the second half at Paycom Middle. Oklahoma Metropolis gained 137-128. Obligatory Credit score: Alonzo Adams-Imagn Photographs OK, so you will have a desperately contrived All-Star Sport. Or worse, All-Star Video games. You already know this stepping into.
Would not or not it’s smart to have a security web?
The Warriors have introduced they plan on retiring Andre Iguodala’s number subsequent week. Nice man. Nicely deserved. Little question, the whole league will take a second and applaud.
So why not do it when everybody can witness it—instantly following the All-Star Sport?
Keep in mind, Iguodala wasn’t simply Golden State’s star performer. He additionally had profitable stints with the 76ers, Nuggets and Warmth, a four-time champ, one-time All-Star and Finals MVP and perennial Defensive Participant of the 12 months candidate who a number of occasions earned Sixth Man votes for his unselfishness.
It is exhausting to not just like the man, each on and off the court docket.
So after the profitable goal quantity is lowered because of time constraints, you will have an exhausted Nikola Jokic, with pizza sauce on his jersey, lacking the potential game-winning shot, resulting in a Jalen Williams (undecided which one) layup—not even a dunk—because the half-filled area joins the half-asleep nationwide viewers in collective boos.
Again to you, Ernie.
As an alternative, you may have Iguodala come out, deliver the gang to its ft, and cap a terrific weekend—one which the Warriors have expertly interjected with franchise legends Curry, Chris Mullin, Mitch Richmond, Tim Hardaway and Baron Davis—with a long-lasting uplifting impression.
A goodbye kiss, if you’ll.
Even Tonya Harding would skate off a winner. Think about that.
